LIFE SENTENCE

It isn't just about how I feel emotionally. It affects everything in life, from your career to friendships and what not! It's generally only the people who know borderlines intimately who are well aware of the extent of their emotional difficulties.

Intense emotional pain, and feelings of emptiness and rejection, anger, hopelessness, and loneliness are common these days.

On the other side, all i see in myself is a girl still sitting in a coffee shop, sobbing and putting her self-respect on stake to mend thing. Nothing changed that decision on the other end. It happens to all of us at some point, i'm told, and when it happens to you for the first time in your life and then again for the second time, it feels as if your world is being blown to bits by the grenade of rejection. Reason being the impact of this chronic syndrome on my physical and mental health.

I sit across my best friend and shake my head, unable to speak my mind and heart out. I well up while crossing the street, while waiting in the line, travelling in metro, and now in a mortifying turn of events, at the coffee shop while this lovely and thoughtful female attendant across from me pats my hand in a show of care and support she does not have the words to express.

Living with Borderline, life normally feels like an emotional roller coaster. You may get misunderstood and misinterpreted. I don't know much about how things will be okay. I will try to keep my cool and my sanity even though I am feeling frustrated, powerless and defeated by my loved one's behavior.

Message to someone who is equally crestfallen...

I cant thank you enough for all the light and laughter we have shared.....You know, I've been thinking about it a lot, and I'm really the one who is at fault. I'm sorry....I pray you make room for your best life to unfold and live a life beyond your wildest imagination with your near and dear ones.